Breakfast in Canada ♡
Updated: May 20, 2022
Friends, I am overwhelmed with awe and gratitude for the kindness you showed me last week when I shared my first post. In no way did I expect this beautiful pour-in of support. I expected to be writing into a void, and for the creative process to be the healing aspect of launching this blog. I was misguided, as I often am when navigating these new grounds of my depression. Instead, your kind words were what carried me through my Tuesday, gave me an appetite on Wednesday, and kept the fuel of inspiration burning as I wrote this post throughout the week.
In an attempt to illustrate the impact of your support, I write to you today about one of my support systems: the Breakfast in Canada group. We’re three friends who have known each other for well over ten years. Currently, we each live on a different continent, and only catch up in-person once or twice a year when in Egypt. We’ve watched each other grow, take big steps in life, face traumatic experiences, and when we meet up for coffee, its…home. It is a very heartwarming time: light, meaningful, loving. A few months ago, we decided to schedule weekly video calls to catch up. We agreed to do it so that its breakfast time in Canada, and afternoon tea/coffee time on the other side of the world. So, we went ahead and named it Breakfast in Canada.
We had this week’s call on Monday morning. And, like always, it was uplifting. I was quiet for the better part of the call. I think I only made two meaningful statements and cracked one or two jokes in an entire hour’s call. I was feeling down that day, so I’m okay with quiet. Hearing them converse made me feel like I was right back home. We floated from one topic to another and discussed our current troubles quite naturally and supportively. Like I said, it was heartwarming.
Even though the past few weeks were rough, Monday was exceptionally difficult. I woke up with a clenched gut and loaded tear buds. I moved through the day quite slowly: it took me two hours to get out of bed, another two to make my way to my desk, thirty minutes to switch on my laptop, and 7 hours to decide on what to eat. (After five hours, I had a cup of coffee to buy myself some time. An hour later, I had some ice cream because I needed even more time, and then I finally decided to have some grilled chicken with rice.)
On our call, we brushed over how I’m struggling to find the motivation to prep for the tutorials I’m teaching. We also talked about hijab. Recently, we have been conversing about the struggles of wearing the hijab under the hot, simmering summer sun. We talked about other important and unimportant things, just like all friend conversations. I came out of this call feeling a lot of love and gratitude. The clenching gut feeling lightened, and my tear buds were at 70% capacity instead of 110%.
I doubt that they know how much their support helps me, especially because it’s not a grandiose kind of support where they buy me a ticket to Hawaii or smother me with are-you-okays. It’s the simple, sincere, I’m-just-here-like-I-always-am kind of support. And I am incredibly grateful for it. We had another call on Thursday and a chat on Friday and my days were better for it, and I can almost visibly notice the impact their support has on me.
Sometimes we think we need to move mountains to make our loved ones feel better. But the truth of the matter is that we are human, and we cannot move mountains. What we can do, instead, is move hearts. We can sit with our loved ones when they are struggling and just be ourselves. And we can, like you have so wonderfully done, send a message of support and empathy or start a conversation.
My Breakfast in Canada group is one of the many supportive friend groups I am blessed to have, elhamdolela, and I now count you all as such. I am not sure why I am surprised at this, but rest assured it is the utmost kind of pleasant surprise. I write this post to all of you, to try and convey how you have uplifted me.
Thank you ♡.
Photo: Good appetite on Wednesday :). I decided to work from a quaint café, and it only took me a moment to decide on what to eat for breakfast. (Actually having breakfast at this point is much progress in an of itself).